Sunday, 29 March 2015

Rule #284: Slow moving pedestrians

If I stop my car to let you cross a parking lot or an intersection, have some respect and HUSTLE! You may not know this, but I'm kind of a big deal, and, ipso facto... I have places to be.


But that's not really the point. I'm talking about common courtesy. When someone holds a door open for you, you say "thank you." Likewise, when you're trying to cross the street and someone stops to let you cross, slowly sauntering your way along like you got nuthin' to do is like saying "thanks for holding the door, but F you! You owe it to me!



Come to think of it, this shouldn't just happen when someone let's you cross. Even if you have the right of way at a light, Shelf your sense of entitlement for a second and move it along!


In the new world, if someone is walking too slow and holding you up, you have the right to run them over!.... Alright, alright. Settle down. No running them over, but they will have to answer to the rule enforcer...
Dr. Phillip Buttersworth III

Dr. Phillip Buttersworth III

AND SO IT SHALL BE WRITTEN!

Saturday, 28 March 2015

Rule #285: Nutrition

During your last appointment with a physician of any sort, specialist or primary care, what happened?
•Did you have a chat about diet, exercise, nutrition, eating plans, or stress management?
•Were you cautioned not to consume too much refined sugar or flour?
•Were you given advice on natural supplements or lifestyle changes that can help you achieve optimal health?
Or did the entire appointment simply address the symptoms you came in with or a screening for an illness you might have? And did it end with the doctor giving you a prescription?

Often, when we take a prescribed drug, we're injesting a substance
to countermeasure all the substances we've subjected our body to which is causing our problem to begin with. It's like taking an anti-virus to correct an ingested poison. If you're feeding your body all kinds of sugar, flour and fats and not living a healthy lifestyle, you SHOULD be sick.

Many times, what is really bothering a person is not cured with a pill, but rather through exercise, physical therapy, or diet changes. This should be the focus of medical school with medication and drugs being a last resort.
A report commissioned by the National Research Council concluded the following:
 “The teaching of nutrition in most U.S. medical schools is inadequate. . . All students should be given a course or its equivalent in the fundamentals of nutrition during the same years in which other basic sciences are offered.”
Crazy, eh? I wonder how the pharmaceutical industry would feel about that?


In the new world, nutrition and healthy living will be a bigger part of the public school curriculum, and make up at least 50% of the medical school program.
AND SO IT SHALL BE WRITTEN!

Friday, 27 March 2015

Rule #286: Taxes


Everyone thinks we pay too much tax. I disagree. The idea behind taxes is for everyone to contribute to the progress of our society and the development of good social programs. I'd even be happy paying MORE taxes. As long as the money goes to good use. And therein lies the problem. We don't like paying tax because of the gross mismanagement of public funds. If I was going to contribute more to tax, the stipulation would be a restructure of government. What's wrong with government? Well, we have too much for one thing. If government was run like a successful business, I would think we could cut political staffing by 50%. Less government would mean less people to argue with each other, which means more would get done. Just imagine the world we would be living in if we had half the government and more funds. The reality, however, is that with less, more productive government.. LESS tax would be required.


 

In the new world, everyone will be willing to pay fair taxes based on the new political structure, and the tax rate for over $1m earners will be 90%.


AND SO IT SHALL BE WRITTEN!

Thursday, 26 March 2015

Rule #287: Bottled water



75% of our world is covered with water. Only 1% is drinkable. If we don't get smart, we WILL run out!
We waste water in many ways, but bottling it just promotes over consumption and waste. Here's some bottled water fun facts:



In 1999, the National Resources Defense Council (NRDC) published the results of a four-year study in which researchers tested more than 1,000 samples of 103 brands of bottled water. These researchers found...

“An estimated 25 percent or more of bottled water is really just tap water in a bottle—sometimes further treated, sometimes not.”
If bottled water does not necessarily offer purer water than tap water, surely it provides a better tasting water product, right? Not so. Bottled water does not always taste better than tap water.
In an interesting study conducted by Showtime television, the hosts found that 75% of tested New York City residents actually preferred tap water over bottled water in a blind taste test.
Bottled water is under the authority of the FDA, while the EPA —under much stricter standards—regulates tap water.
The EPA requires that tap water be tested several times a day and the findings are made public.
The FDA requires bottled water to be tested much less and the results do not have to be made public. Further to that, if the water in the USA is packaged and sold in the same state, it may not be subject to these rules at all.
A much better alternative is to purchase a reverse osmosis unit to install in your home. This will most likely provide the same quality water that you will get in any bottle.



In the new world, water will not be bottled.
AND SO IT SHALL BE WRITTEN!

Wednesday, 25 March 2015

Rule #288: Lunch etiquette


Maybe I'm the only one in the world who feels this way, but I can't stand trying to have lunch with someone who can't put their damn phone down for 60 seconds! Why, in my day, phones were attached to walls and used when necessary, not obsessively. Like if your house was on fire or you needed a pizza ASAP and didn't feel like making one. Oh how times have changed! But really, if you're eating with someone, have the courtesy to give your lunch date your full attention. What could be so important? Is it that you just have to let everyone know that you're eating the first Easter donut of the season?



In the new world, anyone caught texting inappropriately will have their phone smashed out of their hands and be subjected to a public scolding.

BAD!

AND SO IT SHALL BE WRITTEN!

Tuesday, 24 March 2015

Rule #289: Honey garlic


Who thought to put these flavours together? Has anyone ever made a honey and garlic sandwich? No. Why? Because it's grody to the max! Or so says my smokin' hot trophy 80's girlfriend.
I'd rather have peanut butter & cheese. Why can't I order peanut butter and cheese wings? Or get a rack of peanut butter and cheese ribs? I'll enter that in the next ribfest!

In the new world, when honey and garlic wings are ordered, the response will be "gag me with a spoon" do you want fries with that?
AND SO IT SHALL BE WRITTEN!

Monday, 23 March 2015

Rule #290: Tanning beds


Again, another example of putting vanity before health. We know this is bad for you, yet we continue to operate, endorse and use them. What the hell is wrong with us? It's funny when you think about our mentality. We want more exercise but we drive everywhere and try to find the closest spot to the front of the mall. We want more sun, so we go inside and cook ourselves.
The risk of skin cancer increases by 75 per cent when tanning beds are used prior to the age of 35.

Six provinces have now either introduced legislation or brought in regulations that restrict tanning bed use by youth. Quebec, British Columbia, Prince Edward Island, Nova Scotia and Newfoundland have outright bans, while teens in Manitoba need to show parental consent. What does that tell you?







In the new world, tanning beds will be banished from the land!

AND SO IT SHALL BE WRITTEN!