where I keep all my evil stuff, I delight in how halloween brings out the evil, sinister demon in all of us. I also dig the fact that we teach our young-ens to worship the devil at such an early age. You can never encourage them to accept Satan into their hearts too early. But like so many good things there are unseen evils lurking in the shadows. There's one thing specifically that I find tarnishes the sheen of halloween lately.
More and more schools are asking kids to leave their costumes at home on Halloween in lieu of more inclusive “Spirit Days,” “Black and Orange Days,” or “Autumn Celebration Day”. This seems eerily reminiscent of the old Christmas crackdown. Remember how certain places were outlawing the word Christmas and whatnot? Always giving in to peer pressure of the moral minority. Why not let parents decide what is acceptable? And if a child comes to school with a white, pointy sheet over his head and a black and red patch on his shoulder carrying a noose... well maybe someone has to have a sit down with ma and pa.
But what's wrong with dressing up as an astronaut? And what if that astronaut just so happens to be gay and black,.. well so be it. Are you saying astronauts CAN'T be black or gay? Who's the racist now? And there's nothing wrong with dressing up like a cowboy. I think cowboys would be flattered to know a young child thinks so much of them as to dress up like them on this hallowed eve. Now, if this particular cowboy is black and gay... what? Don't tell me you're against cowboys who are black or gay! What's wrong with you?
I find it ridiculous that kids can't dress up as Indians. Just don't let them trick or treat near railroads. We don't want them blocking the tracks and lighting police cars on fire. Now if this Indian who blocks railroads and lights police cars on fire just happens to be gay and black... Well..., OK, I guess I'd have to draw the line there. No gay, black, Indians who block railroads and light police cars on fire. We'll call that the line.
In the new world, parents will decide what is acceptable for kids to dress like on Halloween. And children will be allowed to wear costumes to school on October 31st.
AND SO IT SHALL BE WRITTEN!