Friday, 24 April 2015

Rule #258: Change purse

First off, if you're a dude and you carry anything that ends in "purse".... wrong!
Snoop! You're lettin me down Dogg.

But I don't care who you are, really. If you're the type that has to organize your change into separate compartments, zip up that special little mini fort knox while holding up a line of people the whole time, then you sir, or madam are inconsiderate. The new world is all about common sense and consideration for fellow people. Aint no one got time for dat!

You have time to correct this behavior. I suggest you start now, because in the new world there will be consequences and repercussions for this action. It's attitudes like this that got us into this predicament in the first place. We're mad as hell and we're not
going to take it anymore! How much time is lost waiting in line for someone to wait until they know the total of their purchase, THEN take out their special little change purse, pay, wait for the change, THEN sort it all and put it away neatly before trodding off to their next annoying activity. Personally, I would like to have Dr. Phillip Buttersworth stationed at every checkout counter and when this behavior is observed, he will slap your change purse out of your hand with an upward motion, scattering your precious change all over the place while everyone else laughs and points. However, I must be getting soft in my old age, so we will observe the following:

In the new world, the standard checkout process will be, walk up to the counter with money in hand, pay, accept change and walk away to sort your money elsewhere.



  1. You sound like the loose change Nazi

  2. Well I don't like to brag, but.... I'm kind of a big deal.

  3. Having worked retail for a few years, I've noticed that it is mostly seniors who count out the exact change as most have lived through having to count every penny and are now living in a world where every penny counts for them. I think that those who can't handle waiting the 30-50 seconds that it takes for people to count out change should only be shopping at debit/credit stores.

    1. Elderly people are the only people exempt from the rules. All others will suffer the consequences of Dr. Phillip Buttersworth.


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