Monday, 25 May 2015

Rule #227: Victoria and first peoples day

A group of actors, writers and politicians is calling on Canada's government to change the name of Victoria day to honor Canada's first nations communities as well as the monarchy. They want to call it "Victoria and first peoples day".

Well where do I start with this? I guess I could start with the fact that "peoples" is not even a word when used in this context. You don't say "The first peoples to come to my party get cake" and we're not talking about the people's court here.

Next I guess I'd have to say... GIMME AN EFFING BREAK! Are you telling me that this is the best use of your time? Honestly, I don't give a rat's ass about the queens birthday. And I couldn't care
less if the holiday was called car alarm appreciation day. Just don't unholidayize it. That's right. If you can say peoples, I can say unholidayize! Besides the fact that you're choosing to put forth all this effort to recognize a community that takes away people's (used correctly) rightfully owned property, shuts down industry by blocking railways, practically destroyed a small community (Caledonia), aside from all that, the holiday already HAS A NAME! No action required. Pointless! There are larger issues that require attention. Ever hear of terrorism, child abuse, elder abuse, poverty, male pattern baldness, cancer? All of these issues are much more important than recognizing indians along with some old tart's birthday.

Changing the name of this holiday is a waste of time and resource. If we were going to change it at all, you know what the new name would be, don't you. That's right baby. MAY TWO-FOUR! You want my support? Create ANOTHER holiday and I'll wear an indian headdress and do a rain dance if it'll get me out of work for another day. Otherwise, if you want to acknowledge the role of aboriginal people in the country's evolution, start a museum. With private money.

In the new world, when peoples with too much time and money want to tell the world they're bored, they will be directed to causes that are just, like helping kids who can't read good and wanna do other stuff good too.


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