Wednesday, 29 July 2015

Rule #162: Radio contests

Yesterday I was listening to the radio as I was driving over to pick up my son and his 2 little dogs, Mr. & Mrs. Barky VonSchnauzer. (at least that's what I call them, the rest of world calls them Cody & Chewy).
 Yes, that's a picture of them below.
It's funny, when my ex got those dogs I was pissed. I did not want dogs. That was probably one of the issues that contributed to the relationship demise. Now, I love the little fuckers. They're so cute. I don't let on, but I try to get Chase to bring them over as often as possible. I think I fell in love with them one night when my ex was out of town. I had a party and woke up in the morning on the basement floor. Mrs Barky VonSchnauzer was curled up by my side tucked into my chest. My only morning com padre in an otherwise depressing, drug and alcohol induced haze. Ever since, she's been the champ.
Anyway, as I pull out of my driveway, the lame radio DJ is in the middle of a contest. I don't know what the prize was, but the skill challenging objective was to guess the color of his shirt. I know, I should have just changed the station, but I couldn't. At first I was listening to see what the contest was. Then I was listening to see if it really was what I thought it was. Then I found myself continuing to listen because I had to know what color his fuckin' shirt was! It was so lame. The dj was all like "Hello" and the callers were all like "is it blue?" "BLUE, no, It is not blue" "Is it red?" "RED! No, it is not red" "Is it black?" "BLACK! no, I did not wear the black T today". I remember thinking, this is so stupid, but it's green. I know it's green. Then I hear it: "Is it green?"... "GREEN! No it is not green" I couldn't believe it wasn't green. I yelled aloud "FUCK!" and smashed my fist on the steering wheel.

(Deep breath)
The point is, if your going to put a contest on the air and consume peoples time and attention, please make it worth while.

In the new world, there will be no "guess the color of my shirt" contests.
It was brown. Can you believe it? Fucking brown!


  1. Who the fuck wears a brown shirt?? I think he was just fuckin with the callers, lying, to keep this shitty contest going as long as possible cause he had no imagination to come up with something that could have been half assed entertaining. What station was it?? I demand to know.. I want to boycott it.. enough is a fuckin enough


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