Wednesday, 8 July 2015

Rule #183: Public affection


  Ask my smokin' hot trophy girlfriend, I am not down with this. I won't kiss and hug in public. I refuse to hold hands in the mall. I don't want to watch other people maul each other in front of me, so I won't subject other people to it.


 When I see people groping each other in public, I want to push the dude out of the way and give the girl a stern talking to. I don't have anything against women, It's just that the dude is usually bigger than me. But I don't do it. Because I'm a nice guy. So I do the next best thing. I give them an almost noticeable off glance of disgust and when I'm sure they're out of earshot, I say (under my breath)... Whatever dude. That's right, I don't hold back. And don't get me started on the pride parades. It's like I've said before. Be as gay as you want, just take it inside. A parade isn't necessary and we ain't tryin' to see dat'.


In the new world, a team will be assembled to rate public displays of affection on a scale of 1 to 10. 1 being acceptable and 10 being "Get a room".
Punishment will be the responsibility of Dr. Phillip Buttersworth III.
Dr. Phillip Buttersworth III
AND SO IT SHALL BE WRITTEN!

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