Sunday, 18 October 2015

Rule #81: Ridiculously unbelievable movies

I can handle a little farfetchedness in movies from time to time. Like the scene in Boondock saints when the brothers have a shootout with their dad in the middle of the street and no one gets hit. Or when Bruce Willis escapes a torrent of bullets from bad guys with bad aim in every movie he's ever been in (except sin city). I can swallow all that.
But Hollywood went too far with this one. This enlightenment came while I was laser focused on World War Z the other night. At one point I finally had to call bullshit. No, it wasn't the scene at the beginning when Brad Pitt and his family are the only ones to escape the traffic jam. And no, I wasn't surprised that a magazine taped to your forearm could protect against super fast, mega strong zombies. Nor was I taken aback when Brad correctly figured out which disease to inject himself with in order to repel zombies.
Nope! All that shit can really happen. What pushed me the brink was the plane crash. After having the side of the plane ripped out with his grenade, Brad then locks himself into his seat to prevent being sucked out with all the zombies. That didn't surprise me. Then the plane lands in the woods, splits in half and Brad and his assistant survive. That didn't surprise me. The fact that they landed on the front lawn of the building they just happened to be looking for didn't even phase me.

But the part when the plane finally came to rest and Brad woke up with a metal piece of the seat belt lodged in his abdomen... At that point, I was like... Whatever! As if a small piece of steel is going to penetrate Pitts' chiseled abs. HA! Laughable man! Obviously the writers of World War Z haven't seen "Snatch" where Pitt portrays the bare knuckled, tattooed Pikey "Mickey". If anything, they should have shown that piece of metal being bent on contact with Pitts' abs of steel!


In the new world, if you're going to make a movie, make it either ridiculously ridiculous or believably believable. Don't try to mix fantasy with realism.
AND SO IT SHALL BE WRITTEN!

2 comments:

  1. Agreed. But I do love ridiculous movies.

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