Thursday, 8 October 2015

Rule #91: Schooling

I can't help my 13 year old son with his homework anymore. Anyone surprised? Well I bet you can't do it either. You know why? It stupid, that's why. The crap you learn in kindergarten is where it's at. How to use scissors, interacting with other humans, count, add, build a lego duck, nap... That's the real stuff. Although, if you're not allowed to nap at work, I don't know why they'd teach it in kindergarten. What a cruel lesson. Anyway, those are real life lessons. That's why you still know how to use scissors, count, add and nap (I couldn't build a lego duck if you had a gun to my head).

Teaching kids the shit we do in middle school or junior high or whatever you want to call it, is about as useless as teaching Oprah the virtues of eating right. Seriously! Why the hell would anyone who's destined to be a dog sled mechanic want to learn about poetry? It don't make no sense! It's like teaching algebra to golf ball divers, calculus to cat sitters, Shakespeare to ski slope illustrators, biology to bounty hunters,... It's a slippery slope.

Once you've learned the basics... Readin', writin', and whatnot, it's time to learn life necessities. Not what the man says you need. Everyone's different! So why is the school curriculum the same for everyone? If one teacher can't teach every subject, how could we expect our kids to learn every subject? I say get out there and figure it out. By the end of grade 8 The school system has served it's purpose. The rest is just masturbation! It becomes a game of kids tryin' to learn as little as possible, while the system tries to cram as much as it can into their fragile eggshell minds. My proudly uneducated guess is we retain about 10% of what we learn in school after grade 8. After that, children should be out in the real world instead of paying tens of thousands of dollars to post secondary institutions for a useless degree. Less learnin' and more earnin' is what I say. Working for an employer in exchange for an education makes more sense. Kids work for free in exchange for on the job training in something they're actually interested in. That's the ticket!

In the new world, every grade after the 8th will be at least 50% co-op.


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