Wednesday, 2 December 2015

Rule #36: Hockey Players suing the NHL for concussions


Retired hockey players must have heard about the $765 million settlement awarded to retar… retired NFL players over concussion-related brain injuries.

In a statement, Rick Vaive said players "were kept in the dark about the risks of concussions”. Well, that’s shocking. But you don’t need a medical professional to tell you that repeated smashes to your head are bad. And if you needed more information, you were free to investigate yourself. If I worked in an environment where there was a horrible toxic smell, I would be smart to wear a respirator and get the odor checked out for toxicity. If that smell comes in the form of a 250-pound elbow to the head, you should hold your breath until you get it figured out.
I agree that the league should be doing more to curb violence and should most definitely eliminate fighting. I'll also agree that playing hockey isn't easy, but you can't tell me you didn't see the dangers. You're allowed to repeatedly punch another player in the face as hard as you can. So my message to you is the same as it was to the NFL players:

You played in the NHL for 10 years and now you're semi-retarded and looking for a way to make some more easy money because you never learned how to make an honest buck and you blew the millions you were given on hookers and blow, or whatever you kids do these days. Forget about suing. You never had a real job. You were compensated handsomely and you obviously aren't responsible with money.
In the new world, frivolous lawsuits like these will be thrown out.
AND SO IT SHALL BE WRITTEN!

2 comments:

  1. I was always a huge proponent of the European style of hockey - the goon aspect wasn't near as prevalent as it is in the North American game. Take the Summit Series for instance. Ruskies walk in and lambasted us 7 -3 with superior skating and passing...fast forward to game 6 when Neanderthal Bobby Clarke slashes Kharlamov (arguably the best player in the world at the time) rendering him ineffective for the remainder of the series. Shameful !! But it was accepted, hell, even applauded. I guess what I'm eluding to is, the North American mindset says this is acceptable. That's not hockey ! Snake and I working the drop pass like a Philippino whore short on taxi money. That's hockey ! Like 2 ice-bound dolphins, telegraphing each others moves in a language only we understand. "Eek, eek my friend. I'm over here..."
    Anyway, I think the point you're making is correct. Live by the Sword, die by (you guessed it) The Sword...NO COMPENSATION MUTHA-FUCKAS !!!

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    Replies
    1. The sword! That's what we shoulda called that dolphin like drop pass. EEK EEK! DROP!

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